(Ludacris)
It was Friday night and I was feelin’ aight (Yep)
Downtown Atlanta, big city, bright lights,
Mixin’ Henney wit da Sprite while I’m drinkin’ and drivin’,
No police lights, no police sirens,
I’m headed to da club, lookin’ fo’ a freak,
To spread a lil’ love and spread a couple cheeks,
Pull up to da spot, 26′s like bam!
Eyes on me like “Bitch, do you see him?”
Stroll through the front door, headed to the VIP,
Bought a couple bottles and I took a couple sips,
Scopin’ out da room and what do I see?
A nice round butt and a pair of double D’s,
So I crept up like “Shawty, what’s happen’n?
You kilin’ dat dress and I love it wit’ a passion,”
Den she turned around and her face was aight,
She had a gap tooth and mean overbite,
But I was like hmm…

(T-Pain)
Chorus
If I take one more drink,
I’m gon’ end up f***in’ you,
Is that watchu wanna do, shawty?
If I take one more drink,
I’m gon’ end up f***in’ you,
You too.

Verse 2
(Ludacris)
Woke up da next mornin’ and all I can remember,
Was takin’ shots and tippin’ da bartender,
Surrender to da woman, end up bringin’ me home,
Cause’ she started lookin’ better every shot of Patron (Yep)
I jumped up wit a devilish grin,
Cause’ tonight damn right! I might do it again!
So I called up da homies (What up?)
Let’s ride, we can hit the sportsbar,
Over on the South side,
Get a couple of Coronas, couple of limes,
Went up to da bar, saw a couple of dimes,
So I, slowly walked up an said “Hi,”
My name is Ludacris and I’mma hell of a guy,
One said “I know who you are, I’m your #1 fan,
And right now it’s too bad I got a man,”
And I said “I understand, but where da hell is he at?
Cuz, in a minute if he don’t show up then maaaaan…..”
[www.kantatero.com]

(T-Pain)
Chorus
If I take one more drink,
I’m gon’ end up f***in’ you,
Is that watchu wanna do, shawty?
If I take one more drink,
I’m gon’ end up f***in’ you,
You too.

(Ludacris)
Uh huh,
Ay Pain, holla at em right quick man!

(T-Pain)
You gon’ get in trouble wit yo’ man, girl,
(Don’t get in trouble, girl)
Talkin ’bout how you’re my biggest fan, girl,
(I know it, I know it)
Now I don’t wanna do,
(Please)
What you gon’ make me do,
(Don’t make me do it, don’t make me do it!)
But… if I have one more drink…

Verse 3
(Ludacris)
One more drink I’mma get cha,
Home, then I’ll split cha,
Grab the camera phone,
And take a buncha drunk pictures,
Cause’ Hennessy mixed wit a whole bunch of Buddha,
Equals you mixed wit a whole bunch of Luda,
And you know how far one drink could go,
Start slurrin’ my speech, slowin’ up da FLOOW,
Hikin’ up yo’ skirt, climbin’ up yo’ shirt,
It’s Mr. Late Night Luda and I like to flirt,
So guess what babygurl?

(T-Pain)
Chorus
If I take one more drink,
I’m gon’ end up f***in’ you,
(Just one mo’)
Is that watchu wanna do, shawty?
(That’s all it’s gonna take)
If I take one more drink,
(Hey!)
I’m gon’ end up f***in’ you,
(Haha, who else T-Pain?)
You too.

(Outro)

(Ludacris)
You hear what I’m sayin’?
People too picky these days, dammit!
Too tall, too short, too fat, too skinny,
Have a couple of drinks and quit discriminating,
This is been a Luda Service Announcement…

Deuces…
Hahahahahaha.

[Hook 1:]
Nuh-Nuh Nuh Shawty
Nuh-Nuh Nuh Shawty
Nuh-Nuh Nuh Shawty
Don’t chop me, Shawty don’t Screw Me
Shawty don’t chop me, Shawty don’t Screw Me
Shawty don’t chop me, Shawty don’t Screw Me
Yeah
Yea-Yeah

[Verse 1: T-Pain]
Have you ever seen
A dime piece all alone at the bar (bar-bar)
Straight out of a magazine
And you just want to let her know who you are (are-are)
So you say let me buy you a drink
Or let a conversation
If that’s what you want to do (do-do)
And she said club is about to end
And you said welcome to my crib
And She said I can’t leave my friends

[Chorus 1:]
Now you’ve offically been chopped and screwed
Screwed-Screwed
Chopped-Chopped
And Screwed
You’ve offically been
Dance-Dance
Screwed
And Ewed-Ewed
Chopped
Screwed-Screwed
You’ve offically been chopped and screwed
And-And
Screw
Chop-Screw-Screwed
You’ve offically been Screwed
Screwed
Screw-Screw
Chop-Chop
And Screwed
You’ve officially been
And-And
Screwed

[Hook 2:]
Shawty don’t chop me, Shawty don’t Screw Me (Yeah)
Sha-Shawty don’t chop me, Shawty Screw-Screw (Chopped and Screwed)
Shawty-Shawty don’t chop, Shawty-Shawty don’t Screw Me (HEYYY-Yeah)
Shawty don’t chop me, don’t-don’t Screw Me (Yea-Yeah)

[Verse 2: T-Pain]
Have you ever been in the VIP room
Of your favorite street club (club-club)
And you got a shawty on you
Kissing on your neck
Making you feel like she so in love (love-love)
Now you done grabbed you a couple a drinks
And you feeling like it’s about time to cuddle up (up-up)
And you said shawty what’s really up
And she takes big sip out yo cup
And she said it’ll be 60 bucks

[Chorus 2:]
Now you’ve officially been chopped and screwed
Screwed-Screwed
Chopped-Chopped
And Screwed
You’ve officially been
Dance-Dance
Screwed
And Ewed-Ewed
Chopped
Screwed-Screwed (Luda-Luda (hahaha)
You’ve officially been chopped and screwed
[www.kantatero.com]

[Ludacris:]
Nah-Nah-Nah
Shawty why you acting all like that (like that)
Like all you ever really want to do is just doubt me
Ludacris can’t-can’t live with out ‘em
But even more I bet you really can’t live with out me (nope)
You-You must of flipped yo wig (yup)
You got to be out yo mind (yeah)
I chop ch-chop You screw-You Screw
You out of yo-out of yo spine (woo)
Back breaker
Put you over my knees
Put you on punishment
Women and I’ll spank ya (baaa)
Have you praising the lord
Like thank you-thank you
Thank you lord I want to thank you (Jesus)
But have you ever met a women that will lead you on
And still you work instead of please her (yup)
Have her singing this song
Cause all night long
She did nothing but flirt and tease ya (yup)
But I got to admit that I have
Put one in the air sit back and I laugh (ey)
Shawty why do you insist on doing me that bad (ey)
Probably it’s cause the amount of booty that I grab (ey)
Comming back to haunt me
So instead of being put in submission to subdue (what happened)
Guess what dawg (hahaha) (Lu-Lu-Luda)

[Chorus 3:]
Now you’ve officially been chopped and screwed
Screwed-Screwed
Chopped-Chopped
And Screwed
You’ve officially been
Dance-Dance
Screwed
And Ewed-Ewed
Chopped
Screwed-Screwed
You’ve officially been chopped and screwed
And-And
Screw
Chop-Screw-Screwed
You’ve officially been Screwed
Screwed
Screw-Screw
Chop-Chop
And Screwed
You’ve offically been
And-And
Screwed

[Hook 3:]
Shawty don’t chop me, Shawty don’t Screw Me (Yeah)
Sha-Shawty don’t chop me, Shawty Screw-Screw (Chopped and Screwed)
Shawty-Shawty don’t chop, Shawty-Shawty don’t Screw Me
Shawty don’t chop me, don’t-don’t Screw Me-Me-Me-Me-Me-Me-ME